Forgive to Forget

I forgive you…

For all those nights you left me alone and went out drinking;

For the time you kissed that girl because you “didn’t know what you were thinking”;

For those nights I cried alone while you were sleeping;

For the hundreds of times you lied, didn’t call, didn’t write;

And for the time you ran away to hide.

I forgive you…

For the time you hit me, flung me, kicked me, insulted everything that was me;

For the other time you kissed that other girl when I wasn’t around;

For letting me board the plane, come back home, and face the storm alone;

For not having my back when I needed you most;

For not being here when I gave birth;

And for disappearing so quickly into the night like a ghost

You’re that one that is missing out,

Not knowing what your daughter is about.

You don’t have her light in your darkness,

Nor her hugs and her love for your loneliness.

You don’t have her in your life

And you sure as hell don’t have me as your wife.

But I forgive you. It’s the only way I can forget you.

© Kathya J. Castañeda